Should Your Aging Parent Move In With You?

October 13, 2020

When we think of the term “aging parent,” we think of someone who may be helpless and frail. But that isn’t always the case. Even Sophia lived with her daughter Dorothy in the Golden Girls. She was elderly, but not unable to care for herself.


There are many reasons why families cohabitate. Sometimes it is financial, sometimes it is about preparing for the future. Single parents like their children to be around grandparents and, our solo parents may be lonely.


“...experts expect cohabitation for caregiving to increase sharply in the coming decades, as the boomers age and retirement savings fall short.” Elizabeth O’Brien


If your aging parent moves in with you, there are long-term considerations, however. Can your parent age in place at your home?


Should Your Aging Parent Move in With You?


This is a great question. Your parent should move in with you if you have good communication and the right type of living quarters. The blog “A Place for Mom” has great questions to ask yourself.


You should have a meeting with your partner and children to decide. What will your boundaries look like? What restroom will your parent be using? If the reason you move in together is more financial, then you may have closer quarters. Good fences make great neighbors. Household rules do the same in families.


This question is so personal. Is your home ready? Is your family ready?


Cohabitating is Hard.


Regardless of the reason why you choose to have your aging parents live with you there are inconveniences. Ann Marie Mecera writes candidly about her parents moving in. It was hard on their family, even though the parents lived in a 1,000 square foot apartment.


Aging parents who live with you are roommates with family ties. You may encounter issues you thought were resolved. You may have expenses you didn’t account for.


On the flip side, you may find a close friend you didn’t realize you had. Your parent may feel love and belonging. Your children may love Sunday dinners with their grandparent. Living with you may add years to their lives and improve the quality.


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